Hurricane Visions in Maya Golden’s “The Return Trip” https://ift.tt/6YvfAzg
“Today is the day I am going to die.” That’s how Maya Golden’s memoir opens, and while we know she lives to write The Return Trip, how could we not want to see how?
The book is a raw and honest account of the author’s sexual abuse, her subsequent struggles with perfectionism and addiction, and her attempts to heal.
Golden, the founder and executive director of the 1 in 3 Foundation, a nonprofit that helps women overcome similar experiences, also illustrates — whether intentionally or not — the mixed messages girls receive about sex, love, and being themselves.
Rendering with ease what it’s like to grow up amidst conflicting expectations, she tries to please her hard-working, somewhat distracted (and very of-the-era) parents, her Texas Baptist church community, the mostly white kids she goes to school with, and, eventually, the men she works with during her time as a sports reporter, where she quickly becomes the “coolest chick” — likely a learned capability, possibly a survival skill.
She hides the real her for so long that she doesn’t know who she is anymore. She notes how she’s always felt more at ease around men than other women, then later that she only feels safe talking to a female therapist. In her late teens, she finds solace in online sex chat rooms but also NSYNC songs. She’s ambivalent about marriage and motherhood (her notes on Elmo are particularly humorous).
In fact, despite the dark premise, the book is laugh-out-loud funny. A younger Golden wonders if her guardian angels day drink. She’d rather stick a cactus up her ass than sit in her mother’s living room. She thinks about reminding her husband of the dangers of setting his cell phone so close to his “nuts.” These lines and more like them are delivered with a delightful element of relatability and surprise.
Although the structure, which jumps between periods of childhood, adolescence, and adulthood, can be a bit jarring at times, Golden expertly plants clues that drive the narrative and the reader forward. An example is when, within the first few pages, she casually mentions the muscle relaxants in her possession are a common gift from her mom.
She once escaped distress in her life by generating what she calls the eye of the hurricane. It must have been difficult to relinquish that space and bravely share her story, especially since the first person she confided in about the violation of her body, a fellow teenage girl, responded with disbelief. Golden, however, hopes to empower others who might be living with shame.
NONFICTION The Return Trip: A Memoir
By Maya Golden
Rising Action Publishing
Published November 14, 2023
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